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It is an uncanny experience to see a family image, one you thought only existed in a frame in your living room, on an online historical archive.
 
In 2019, I stumbled upon my family's archive after becoming interested in my family's history. This interest was sparked following a conversation I had at a formal dinner in New York, where I was freshy two weeks into my undergraduate programme. After mentioning my Grandfather’s name, a person that I did not realise would know him had a look of recollection on her face and began to tell me stories of his youth. My Sido (Grandfather) passed a week before my 7th birthday, and I became curious about his life following this interaction and decided a Google search would satisfy my curiosity for the time being until I could go to Jordan. Google presented me with an image I was very familiarwith; Sido in a three-piece suit, his signature moustache, and his Italian Greyhound Prince, an image that my mother, aunts, and Grandmother kept prominently in their homes. It was not hard to recognise him. The image was part of my family’s archive on the Arab Image Foundation website. All of a sudden, I was confronted with a history I did not know existed.
 
Ever since I was a little girl, I would pester my Teta (Grandmother) asking who all these people are in our family photos on the walls. My Teta would refer to the people in the photos with such a casual tone, it was as if one had asked what was for lunch that day. They hung in golden frames, and to my unknowing mind, I thought they were all extended family; the archive proved otherwise. It was only until 2021, when I was able to go back to Jordan following Covid, did I truly saw the vastness of this history and the archives. Albums upon albums that I was able to go through with my Teta, where she would tell me all the stories behind the images, as well as my family's history. It was a process that allowed me to get closer to the images, my family, and my grandfather’s memory. A year following her passing I found three more albums hidden under a pile of papers; these albums have been the main source of my work going forward. They, unlike the first set of albums, which were meticulously put together by my Sido, appear in leather-bound albums, captionless; it became a guessing game of piecing together memories that are not my own. Using the first set of albums as a reference point, I reverse image search and use the information I have access to, to understand the images and place them within their history. Cars, specific buildings, and a historical figure here and there all help to uncover what is a lost history.
 
The mystery of the images is what keeps them alive. There is always more than what is shown and what is told - in this case, what is not mentioned. Some images have no captions and some have two, once in a while, you will find a misplaced caption, including one of my own baby photos titled “Michael the Russian congressman.” Understanding the photos alone is a process that is as enjoyable as painting them. In order to maintain the integrity of my Grandfather's work, I do not alter much of the original when it becomes a painting. Other than the cropping, colourising, and redirecting the focus, the initial photographic reference image stays the same, as I want my Sido’s work to be seen. I have become somewhat of an archive keeper in the journey of these ongoing paintings, and preserving both my Sido’s work and the family history is at the forefront of my concern. As it continues, the research never ends with new pieces of information popping up and a new background moment waiting to be seen when each album is reopened.
 
These albums not only reminisce about half a century of Middle Eastern diplomacy but also bear witness to the evolution of a family. The albums are no longer direct representations of history but tangible yet elusive vessels of memory. A sense of unease permeates the artist’s work—non-linear, non-experiential indirect connections deconstruct the temporal logic of the original images through painting, stripping the past from its specific historical context and embedding it into her contemporary visual, emotional, and perceptual framework. This creates a "tug-of-war," presenting a series of opposing states: archive and present, original and copy, seen and concealed, understood and obscured. Viewers are invited to join the artist in solving a puzzle that does not belong to them, piecing together history through minimal clues in the titles and magnified details of cropped photographs, allowing the past to resurface, be excavated, and rediscovered in another form. 

 

 

 

当我在一个网络历史档案上看到了一张自己的家庭照片,我原以为仅存于家中客厅的相框里,一种诡异的熟悉感在那一刻涌上心头。

 

2019年,我开始对家族历史产生兴趣,偶然发现了这些尘封的家族档案。这份兴趣源于一次我在纽约一场正式晚宴上的对话,那时我刚入读大学本科两周。在我提及外公名字(Sido)时,一位没想到会认识他的女士突然露出追忆的神色,开始向我讲述外公青年时代的故事。我的Sido在我七岁生日前一周就离世了,而这次的对话激起了我对他人生的好奇,于是我决定先通过谷歌搜索来一探究竟,直到我有朝一日去到约旦。搜索引擎呈现了一张我无比熟悉的照片:Sido身着三件套西装,蓄着标志性胡须,身旁蹲着他的意大利猎狗"王子",是那幅被我母亲、姑妈和外婆摆放在家中最显眼的位置的影像。我立马就认出了他。这张照片还出现在阿拉伯影像基金会网站上关于我们家族的档案库里。我猝不及防地面对了一段曾经毫不知情的历史。

从小我就爱缠着我的Teta(外婆)追问墙上家庭照片里的人物。她总用仿佛只是在谈论当天午餐般的随意语气回答我。那些装裱在鎏金相框里的面孔,在我懵懂的认知里觉得他们全是我的远房亲戚;直到那些档案颠覆了我的看法。2021年新冠疫情后重返约旦时,我才真正见识到这段历史的浩瀚。我和我的Teta共同翻阅了无数相册,她为我讲述每张照片背后的家族故事与秘辛。这个过程让我得以贴近了这些影像、我的家族,以及关于外公的记忆。在她离世一年后,我又从一堆文件下发现了三本尘封的相册,它们在未来成为了我后续创作的主要素材。与我外公精心整理的首批相册不同,这些皮质相册里的照片没有任何说明,我不得不像玩拼图游戏般拼凑这些不属于自己的记忆。以一开始的几本相册作为参照,我反向通过图像搜索结合现有资料来解读这些影像,并将它们安置回其曾经的历史。车辆、特定建筑、不时出现的历史人物,都成为揭开失落往事的密码。

正是这些影像的未解之谜赋予了它们永续的生命。所见所述之外总有未尽之言——有些照片没有注释,有些却标着双重说明,偶尔还会出现张冠李戴的标题,比如有一张我的婴儿照竟被标记为"俄罗斯议员迈克尔"。解读照片本身就和绘制它们一样充满乐趣。为保持祖父原作的完整性,我在将其转化为画作时尽量不做过多改动。除了裁剪、上色和焦点的调整,原始的摄影参考基本保留,因为我希望人们能够看见外公的相片。在这持续进行的绘画之旅中,我俨然成为了档案的守护者,保存外公的相册与家族历史成为了我的首要使命。探索持续进行,研究永无止境,每次重新翻开相册,总有新的信息浮现,沉默的背景故事仍在时光深处等待着被照亮。


 

Text | Tiyana Mitchell

Translate | Marjorier Ding

Edit | Jiachen Zeng

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